


when you say my name i want to stop it in your lungs

by dangercupcake



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Ficlet, Gen, Secrets, Sibling Relationship, goalie superstitions, incest thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-27
Updated: 2016-10-27
Packaged: 2018-08-27 09:04:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8395678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dangercupcake/pseuds/dangercupcake
Summary: No one in hockey has a secret, even the people who think they do.





	

Sid sometimes thinks about Taylor when he jerks off. He used to think it made him wrong and dirty, but now it's regular, like how he sometimes thinks about Tanger or Flower, and once in a while he thinks about Carole-Lyne. She's just part of his rotation. The way she chews on her mouth when her lips are chapped. Her goalie superstitions -- she insists she doesn't have any, but why does she always eat a cheese sandwich the morning of a game? Cheese sandwich for breakfast. When they play against each other for fun, she eats a cheese sandwich first. Did she think he wouldn't notice?

He notices.

He notices everything.

He wonders sometimes about kissing her. Touching her face gently, tilting her head back, their mouths coming together. She looks at him like she wants that -- their fingers lingering too long, bodies curled up too close when they watch TV, eyes on mouths instead of ... well. Sidney knows he doesn't get it sometimes, but he gets this.

Except... he's pretty sure he can have Taylor or he can have hockey, but he can't have both. Because he can be the best in the world at hockey, but that means he can't have any secrets. Not really. No one in hockey has a secret, even the people who think they do. And he knows he can live without Taylor. But he also knows he _can't_ live without hockey. So if Taylor is waiting for him to give a signal that it's okay, that it won't fuck them up -- or waiting for him to make a move, to step across that taboo boundary -- it's just never going to happen. It can't happen.


End file.
